Jamb question

Animal Jokes

Q: Why did the cat go to Minnesota?
A: To get a mini soda!
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Q: Where do orcas hear music?
A: Orca-stras!
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Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side.
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Q: What do you call a fish without an eye?
A: Fsh!
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 Q: What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?
A: Take the words out of his mouth!
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Q: What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?
A: A chili dog on a bun.
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Q: Why do fish live in salt water?
A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!


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Q: Where do mice park their boats?
A: At the hickory dickory dock.
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Q: Where did the sheep go on vacation?
A: The baaaahamas
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Q: What do you call a thieving alligator?
A: A crookodile
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Q: What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?
A: A watch dog.
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Q: What do you call a cow that eats your grass?
A: A lawn moo-er.
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Q: What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?
A: Lilly.
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Q: How does a dog stop a video?
A: He presses the paws button.
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Q: Why do cows go to New York?
A: To see the moosicals!
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Q: What do you call lending money to a bison?
A: A buff-a-loan
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Q: What is the snake’s favorite subject?
A: Hiss-story
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Q: What is black ,white and red all over?
A: A sunburnt penguin!
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Q: Why does a dog wag its tail?
A: Because there’s no one else to wag it for him.
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Q: What is a cat’s favorite movie?
A: The sound of Mew-sic!
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Q: How do you make a goldfish old?
A: Take away the g!
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Q: Why did the lamb cross the road?
A: To get to the baaaaarber shop!
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Q: How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?
A: Squeaky clean!
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Q: What has four legs and goes “Oom, Oom”?
A: A cow walking backwards!
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Q: Where do you put barking dogs?
A: In a barking lot.
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Q: What do you call a pig that’s been arrested for dangerous driving?
A: A road hog.
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Q: What is a cheetahs favorite food?
A: Fast food!
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A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, “Where were you during the first half?” He replied “Putting on my shoes!”.
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Q: What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?
A: Me-ow!
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Q: What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear!
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Q: Why did the dog cross the road twice?
A: He was trying to fetch a boomerang!
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Q: What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
A: Its shadow!
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Q: What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A: Porkchop!
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Q: Where does an elephant pack his luggage?
A: In his trunk!
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Q: There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
A: None, because they were copycats!
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Q: Which day do fish hate?
A: Fryday!
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Q: What do you call a cow in a tornado?
A: A milkshake!
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Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant?
A: Nothing, peanuts don’t talk.
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Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: No I deer!
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Q: Why was the cat afraid of a tree?
A: Because of the bark!
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Q: How are elephants and trees alike?
A: They both have trunks!
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Q: What do you call an exploding monkey?
A: A baboom!
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Q: What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
A: Stuck!
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Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer!
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Q. How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?
A. Put him in the front seat.
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Q: What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A: A car only has one horn.
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Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?
A: Do you want to grab a bite?
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Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?
A: Time to get a new bed!
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Q: Where does a ten ton elephant sit?
A: Anywhere it wants to!
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Q: What was the first animal in space?
A: The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Q: What do you get when you plant a frog?
A: A cr-oak tree.
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Q: What is the quietest kind of a dog?
A: A hush puppy.
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Q: How is a dog like a telephone?
A: It has a collar I.D.
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Q: Why do cows wear bells?
A: Because their horns don’t work.
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There were two cows in a field. The first cow said “moo” and the second cow said “baaaa.” The first cow asked the second cow, “why did you say baaaa?” The second cow said, “I’m learning a foreign language.”
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Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away his credit card!
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Q: Why do you bring fish to a party?
A: Because it goes good with chips.
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Q: What would happen if pigs could fly?
A: The price of bacon would go up.
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Q: How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?
A: Take away his shovel!